Automatic merge from submit-queue

Use shared informers for proxy endpoints and service configs

Use shared informers instead of creating local controllers/reflectors
for the proxy's endpoints and service configs. This allows downstream
integrators to pass in preexisting shared informers to save on memory &
cpu usage.

This also enables the cache mutation detector for kube-proxy for those
presubmit jobs that already turn it on.

Follow-up to #43295 cc @wojtek-t 

Will race with #43937 for conflicting changes 😄 cc @thockin 

cc @smarterclayton @sttts @liggitt @deads2k @derekwaynecarr @eparis @kubernetes/rh-cluster-infra